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Four reasons why people fall out of love and how to fix it

2022 May 29, 10:22, India

Falling in love can be described as one of the most beautiful feelings in the world, one in which you experience a roller coaster of exhilarating reactions that sends you into a state of ecstasy. Sadly the "in love" joyride doesn't last forever.

After the initial flame of infatuation subsides, couples either find a steady and loving partnership or discover that the romance has fizzled out, resulting in at the end of a relationship. However, it is not uncommon sometimes that people to fall "out of love" even after they find that special someone.

It is completely natural and there can be dozens of reasons why your loving feelings towards someone can change and the love diminishes even though you once felt so deeply passionate about this person. So, let's have a look at some of those reasons and what can be done to fix them.

Lack of Novelty

Excitement, change and new experiences are as important in a relationship as are stability, loyalty and certainty. When that sense of novelty with your partner starts to fade, people feel bored or empty and seek new experiences.

Try this

- Plan playful and unpredictable dates for each other.

- Verbalise your love and appreciate your partner more often.

- At least, once a week does something your partner likes doing.

- Pursue a common interest or hobby together.

- Share kinks and fantasies to amp up your sex life.

- Remember, every now and then it's normal for long-term relationships to feel stagnant.

Built-Up Resentment

Often resentment occurs when people let their core values be ignored or lost within the relationship. When this continues for a prolonged period of time repeatedly it erodes the relationship.

Try this

- Setting healthy boundaries and stating your needs clearly and regularly without waiting for the resentment to build up is very important along with learning how to say 'No'.

- Always try to maintain your individuality within the relationship.

- Have a little ritual to 'break up' with your resentment: Write down your resentments on a piece of paper and burn or release them.

Growing in Different Directions

It is not uncommon for people in love to go on different paths when their values, dreams and priorities no longer align with each other. In such instances, it is important to evaluate if one wants to stay in that relationship or let it go with love and respect.

Try this

- Look for common ground: Try to find if there is anything to hold the relationship together meaningfully?

- Come to terms with that not every relationship is meant to last for a lifetime.

- Understand that it's possible that even two people who loved each other can grow in different directions.

- Explore a different way to preserve the relationship, but this may or may not be desirable.

Destructive Communication

Falling out of communication can be considered the first step of falling out of love. Some factors that can be relationship killers are passive-aggressive communications, lack of attention, stonewalling and constant criticism.

Try this

- Always strive to speak life into one another.

- Make efforts to communicate with respect even when you are angry or frustrated.

- Communicate with each other even when it gets hard and uncomfortable.

- Remember that every disagreement is not an argument.

Please note, that the ideas shared here do not apply to extreme scenarios or abusive relationships. We might fall out of love in such situations and have no intention of reviving them. If something you read here does not resonate or feel appropriate for your unique experience, feel free to disregard it. 


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